Summer of no Regrets Read online

  Contents

  Title Page

  Dedication

  Chapter 1: Hetal

  Chapter 2: Cam

  Chapter 3: Sasha

  Chapter 4: Nell

  Chapter 5: Hetal

  Chapter 6: Cam

  Chapter 7: Sasha

  Chapter 8: Nell

  Chapter 9: Hetal

  Chapter 10: Cam

  Chapter 11: Sasha

  Chapter 12: Nell

  Chapter 13: Hetal

  Chapter 14: Cam

  Chapter 15: Sasha

  Chapter 16: Nell

  Chapter 17: Hetal

  Chapter 18: Cam

  Chapter 19: Sasha

  Chapter 20: Nell

  Chapter 21: Hetal

  Chapter 22: Cam

  Chapter 23: Sasha

  Chapter 24: Nell

  Chapter 25: Hetal

  Chapter 26: Cam

  Chapter 27: Sasha

  Chapter 28: Nell

  Chapter 29: Hetal

  Chapter 30: Cam

  Chapter 31: Sasha

  Chapter 32: Nell

  Epilogue: Nell

  Acknowledgements

  Copyright

  SUMMER OF

  NO REGRETS

  KATE MALLINDER

  To Sophie, Rory, Noah and Tilda for inspiring me every dayAnd Mark, for your unwavering support

  Chapter 1

  Hetal

  Sasha was filling us in on her post-exam snog. ‘It was right after the last maths paper – and you know how stressed that exam made me.’

  We all nodded. I remembered the stress: late-night calls, tears and a recurring theme of ‘I hate numbers and numbers hate me’, which if I’m honest, I struggle to comprehend. Numbers are wonderful. You know where you stand with numbers. Here’s why:

  They follow the rules. A two doesn’t suddenly think it’ll try being a three. They know their place.

  They react the same way every time and once you’ve got the right answer, it’ll always be right.

  You don’t have to write opinion pieces in maths. You just have to show the working out.

  There are no grey areas…

  ‘You still with us, Hetal?’ Sasha interrupted my thoughts.

  ‘What?’ I said. ‘Oh sorry, got side-tracked by … something.’ Despite them being my best friends in the whole world, it’s still not a great idea to confess to daydreaming a number love-list. But if I were to list my favourite numbers, they’d be 49, 512, 3.14159…

  ‘Well,’ Sasha continued, rolling her eyes, ‘as we were walking out of the sports hall, he caught my eye. He’s not in my maths set, so who knows what his name is.’

  ‘But you know now, right?’ said Nell, her eyes wide.

  ‘Sure.’ Sasha flicked her hair. ‘Let’s call him … Fit Boy.’

  Cam sniggered. ‘I can’t believe you, Sasha. So you got with him right on the sports-hall steps?’

  Sasha looked momentarily self-conscious before grinning.

  ‘YOU DID!’ shrieked Cam. ‘Argh, I was only kidding, but you did.’

  ‘It was the adrenaline rush,’ said Sasha, shrugging her shoulders. ‘What can I say? Everyone else was hugging, I decided I’d prefer something else, that’s all. Perfect end to any maths exam.’

  Cam was laughing so hard, tears rolled down her cheeks. ‘I can’t believe you! That’s outrageous!’

  Nell was looking shocked but kind of in awe of Sasha.

  ‘So,’ I said. ‘Was “Fit Boy” any good?’

  ‘He had just the right mix of lips, tongue and teeth,’ grinned Sasha.

  My brain fired up. What, like a ratio, did she mean?

  ‘Plenty of the first two and none of the last,’ she elaborated.

  Aha. So a ratio of 1:1:0. Good to know.

  Sleepovers don’t change much really. We’re pretty much doing the same things at sixteen that we were at thirteen except we talk about boys way more, the movies are rated higher and my parents have given up telling us to keep the noise down. But other than that, the basics are still the same. It’s still me, Cam, Sasha and Nell, all squashed into my bedroom with a mountain of duvets and piles of make-up, all talking at once, laughing loud enough to scare the cat and sharing secrets.

  ‘Are you going to see him over the summer then?’ asked Nell, still looking star-struck.

  Sasha faltered for a moment. ‘I’m not sure.’

  ‘Why not?’ I asked. If he had the perfect kiss ratio, and was cute, then why wouldn’t she?

  ‘My dad’s got a contract in Geneva and he’s asked if I want to go and spend a few weeks over there with him.’

  What?

  ‘Thought you’d just casually drop Geneva into the conversation? What the…? Are you going?’ asked Cam. Her pale cheeks had flared red, like they always did when she got excited.

  ‘It would be good for my French if I did, and I’ve never been abroad, so that would be, well, awesome.’

  Sasha’s face didn’t match what she was saying. If it was such a great idea, why didn’t she look like she believed it?

  ‘But do you want to go?’ I asked.

  Sasha ran her hands through her long, wavy hair, pulling it back from her face. ‘I don’t know. I mean, yes, of course, it’s Switzerland! Who wouldn’t? But…’ She paused. ‘But it means leaving Mum. And I don’t get to see you guys for ages and this was supposed to be our summer. The summer of us.’

  I totally got her. I wouldn’t want to go either. Why go somewhere new where anything could happen? Besides, we’d been making plans for this summer for months. I’d made a list (not that this is unusual – I make lists about pretty much everything. Once, I had so many lists on the go, I had to make a list of lists).

  After the exams, we would:

  Have massive ice-cream sundaes for breakfast

  Go surfing

  Shop till we dropped in Plymouth

  Camp out

  Go out on Cam’s dad’s boat

  Watch all the Harry Potter movies in a day (& night)

  Sasha looked glum, and let her hair fall to one side, covering her face.

  ‘Tough call,’ said Cam finally.

  Someone tapped gently on my bedroom door and Nani poked her head round.

  ‘I thought I’d say goodnight before I turn in,’ she said. Nani lives with us and is, by far and away, my favourite adult.

  ‘Night, Nani.’ I looked at her face. Her eyes didn’t seem as sparkly as usual and her eyeliner had smudged.

  ‘Night, Mrs M,’ said the others.

  ‘Hetal, honey,’ said Nani, ‘would you help me send an email tomorrow?’

  ‘Sure, no problem. Who are you emailing?’

  ‘My dear friend Elsie. Seems we need to embrace technology. We don’t have time to waste waiting for letters to and from Australia.’

  There was something different about Nani’s face.

  Something definitely wasn’t right.

  ‘Are you OK?’ I asked.

  ‘What me? I’m fine. When you get to my age, it’s to be expected.’

  We all sat watching my nani from under our duvets.

  ‘The other thing with being my age is that you look back at your life and you can see so clearly where you went wrong. Forgive me, Sasha, for eavesdropping, but I heard you mention a trip abroad and I have some advice. For each of you.’

  We were all concentrating on Nani properly now.

  ‘Live your life. Grab it. Seize opportunities when they come along, otherwise you’ll end up old women with hearts full of regrets.’

  Her voice cracked a little. My usually so jolly, so positive Nani was on the verge of losing it. I looked round at my friends to see if they had noticed too. Sasha was frowning and Nell
looked a little terrified. Cam was nodding.

  ‘Nani?’ I said softly. ‘What’s wrong?’

  Nani sniffed and wiped her eyes with a tissue. ‘I got some bad news today, that’s all.’

  My heart clenched. What if Nani was seriously ill? What if she had life regrets because she was running out of life?

  Nani glanced at me, like she could read my mind. ‘I’m fine. Fit and healthy as the next seventy-one-year-old. I’m only telling you this so you don’t make the same mistakes.’

  I relaxed a bit. So what was it? What had made my lovely, gorgeous inside-and-out Nani so sad?

  Nani stepped further into the room, adjusting her dressing gown. ‘I’m not going to spoil your sleepover with my troubles. But girls, take it from me, don’t put off living: have adventures, do things that scare you. Don’t say, I’ll do it when I’m older, when I’ve got a job, when I’ve got a boyfriend, after I’ve had kids, when I’ve retired. Do it now. Spend your time with the people you care about, but don’t let them tie you down. You get one chance. Take it. Grab it and don’t let go.’

  Sasha and Cam were nodding and Nell still looked nervous, as if Nani might make her do something that scared her right there and then.

  ‘You’re good girls, you are,’ said Nani, looking at each of us in turn. ‘Now I’m going to let you get on with your sleepover.’

  ‘Thanks, Mrs M,’ said Sasha. ‘Hope we don’t keep you awake.’

  ‘Make as much noise as you like,’ smiled Nani. ‘It’s what earplugs were invented for.’

  We all laughed.

  She blew us a kiss and pulled the door closed behind her.

  ‘Oh, she’s dropped something.’ Nell picked up a folded piece of paper.

  ‘Give it here,’ I said.

  ‘Are you going to read it?’ said Sasha.

  ‘No! Of course not.’

  ‘Don’t you want to know what it says?’ asked Cam.

  ‘Yes, but it’s not right.’

  ‘OK, I’ll read it.’ Cam plucked it from Nell’s fingers.

  ‘No,’ I cried. ‘Don’t.’ I should have stopped her. I definitely should have stopped her.

  ‘It says it’s from Elsie.’

  ‘That’s who she wants to email, her friend in Australia,’ I nodded. ‘They’ve been friends since forever. Nani said Elsie was her only friend when she first came from India. Then Elsie married an Australian and emigrated. Not sure Nani’s seen her since.’

  ‘And they’ve kept in touch all this time?’ said Nell.

  I shrugged. ‘They’re best mates.’

  Cam was busy reading. ‘Her handwriting’s illegible. If I was your nani I would have suggested emailing ages ago, just so I could know what she’s on about.’

  ‘What’s it say?’ Sasha leaned over Cam’s shoulder.

  ‘Hang on. Elsie isn’t very well.’ Cam’s voice softened. ‘She’s got cancer. The doctors say it’s terminal. She’s not got long.’

  We all went quiet.

  ‘Poor Nani,’ I muttered. ‘No wonder she’s upset.’

  I glanced round at my friends, Cam holding the paper, Sasha leaning on her shoulder and Nell looking at me, her brown eyes glistening. They’d known my nani forever, she was always giving us bits of advice.

  ‘Your nani’s right, you know,’ Cam sighed.

  ‘About what?’ said Sasha.

  ‘About living our lives. Seizing the day.’ Cam stood up. ‘So, how about it? A summer of living life to the max. Full tilt. Who’s in?’

  ‘Sounds exhausting,’ I said. ‘You don’t have to be doing everything, all at once. What if your ideal summer is having a monster lie-in every day?’

  We all laughed.

  ‘OK,’ said Sasha, ‘what about this? A summer of going outside our comfort zones?’

  ‘But my bed is the absolute definition of my comfort zone,’ I retorted. ‘And I’ll never regret a single millisecond I spend in it.’

  ‘That’s it!’ Cam declared.

  ‘What’s it?’ said Nell.

  ‘That’s what we’ll have: a summer of no regrets.’

  Chapter 2

  Cam

  I knew exactly where I was going to start. With something that I’d been bugging my foster-mum Jackie about for ages. Last year she stopped me, saying she had right of veto because the legal age was sixteen. But now I’m sixteen, she can go whistle. I set off into town, the morning sunshine already bright. Pulling my sunglasses on I grinned to myself; today was going to be a Very Good Day.

  Several hours later, the hairdresser held up the mirror behind me.

  ‘What do you think?’

  ‘But … but it’s pink!’ I said, widening my eyes.

  The hairdresser’s face fell. ‘You asked for Candy Dust, though,’ she stuttered.

  ‘Only messing with you. It’s great. Cheers.’ I mussed up my short and now shockingly pink hair and grabbed my phone. Pink hair and no regrets – I was off to a bitching good start. I snapped a selfie and shared it with the girls: #NoRegrets.

  Sasha: What the hell, Cam? You are ROCKING that look!

  Hetal: Loving it!

  Nell: Of all the things to do, it had to be pink hair?!

  Me: So what about you lot? It’s been 3 days. Anyone else done anything yet?

  Sasha: Want to meet up? I’ve got some news.

  Hetal: Good, I hope.

  Me: Thequay?

  Nell: See you in 5.

  I walked down the hill from the town and across the market square. We always meet up at the second to last bench on the promenade that runs the length of the quay. It overlooks a narrow waterway, which has a pontoon running along the centre, with dozens of little boats moored up alongside it. The air’s full of seagulls cawing and the chink chink of taut lines against masts. The market was on and stalls selling children’s wetsuits, carved wooden mice and secondhand books jostled for attention. I love it here. I love the sea and the way that life by the sea revolves around tide times and full moons.

  I was the first at our bench, so I sat munching on a pasty I’d got from the butcher’s next to the hairdresser’s. A huddle of kids were crabbing on the jetty, squealing whenever one escaped and ran towards them on pointy legs, claws held up. A tern and her chicks were swimming past me, and a man was rowing towards his boat. I love that the people round here never seem to be rushing.

  ‘There she is!’ I heard. ‘The candyfloss herself.’

  Walking towards me was Hetal, never knowingly overdressed in her standard jeans and a jumper, with geeky black glasses. I’m allowed to call her geeky – she totally sees it as a compliment. Next to her, but a pace behind, was Nell, with her usual long sleeves, and then Sasha, who was showcasing her early season tan in tiny shorts, a tied top and sunglasses pushed into her hair and was, of course, the one shouting.

  How I managed to deserve friends like these, I will never know.

  ‘Oh, shut up,’ I yelled back, which earned a tut from some passing old guy. I resisted the urge to reply with two fingers.

  ‘You look totally freakin’ awesome,’ said Sasha. ‘Honestly. I’m blown away.’

  ‘Thanks.’ I grinned. I felt totally freakin’ awesome, to be honest.

  ‘Give us some,’ said Nell. ‘I’m starving.’ She took a massive bite out of my pasty.

  I gave her what was left. ‘So, you said you had some news?’ We all looked at Sasha, who beamed.

  ‘I’ve made a decision about Geneva. I’m going.’

  I squealed. ‘Brilliant – what made you change your mind? Ah, I’m so jealous! You’re swanning off to Switzerland and I’m staring down the barrel of a summer spent working the till in Papa John’s hardware shop.’

  ‘It was what your nani was saying, Hetal, the other night. I thought, I need to try it. If I hate it, I can always come home early, can’t I?’

  ‘What are you going to do while you’re there?’ said Nell.

  ‘I don’t know. Dad’ll be working a lot of the time, I guess, so I get to
explore the city, check out the local sights.’

  ‘Check out the local lads, more like,’ said Hetal, grinning.

  ‘That thought had crossed my mind.’

  We sat along the bench, all silent for a moment, Nell finishing off my pasty. It was going to be weird without Sasha.

  ‘When do you go?’ I asked.

  ‘Tomorrow.’

  ‘What?’ said Nell. ‘Tomorrow? Flippin’ heck, you don’t hang about.’

  ‘Sorry.’ For a split second, Sasha didn’t look so happy.

  ‘You sure you’re alright about it, Sash?’ I asked. There was something bothering her but I couldn’t tell what it was. And I bet she wouldn’t tell us. That’s Sasha all over. Keep it all in and try and fix it herself.

  ‘Yeah. Totally.’ Her face was back to normal again, and I wondered if I’d imagined it. ‘Sorry about the short notice though. How about we do something today? You know, before I go.’

  ‘Cam, what about your dad’s boat?’ asked Hetal.

  ‘He’s not my dad,’ I snapped.

  ‘Right, sorry. But what about the boat? Do you think we could use it?’

  Hetal looked all fidgety cos I’d snapped. But I wasn’t sorry – it was important. He was a foster-dad, not my real dad. Papa John and Jackie wouldn’t stick around once the social money stopped coming. Not like blood, which is forever.

  ‘I’ll go and ask him.’

  I ran back along the quay, through the market and up the street to the hardware shop. The door jangled as I pushed it open.